It's currently 5:27 AM and I can't sleep at all. I usually fall asleep around 6, 6:15 and sleep till like 3, but I have to get up around 10 tomorrow to go buy things. Boy do I love getting up early... !
I figured I'd give a quick post.
I leave in 2 days. Am I ready to go home? Yes. Will I come back? I dunno. Will I miss people here? Surely. Do I miss people from home? YES. My friends are like gold. My family is like gold. My boss and coworkers are like gold. I miss everyone a lot. And MAN, I really miss baking bread! I don't have an oven here, otherwise I'd make it all the time. I can't wait to punch dough. Then let it rise and punch it again.
My friend sent me this video about buses in Jordan.. sooooo funny and SO TRUE!
I have so many things to do and so little time. I have to buy some gifts. I have to say goodbye to people. I have to make some gifts for people here, and I have to finish packing. It's stressful.
I got my certificate from school. Actually when I got it, it had the wrong score on it. I said "Hey.. that's not my score, you need to print it out again." He found my score and printed it. Then on the second one, it said "Charisse Lensen." Who is that? I said "Hey.. that's not my name, you need to print it out again." The third time was good.
So I keep pondering, and so many things amaze me. I remember when I first got off the plane, I knew NOTHING. I knew how to say "Hello, my name is Charisse," and a few numbers. I knew so little about the culture. I had never met Tamara's family before. The cars, the streets, the buildings, the signs, the sounds, the weather, the stores, TV, the food... I couldn't picture any of it.
I feel like I know so much and so little at the same time. I have so much more to learn about Islam and Muslims, but I know a lot more than I did. Please everyone, don't think that Islam is that craziness you see on TV. Extremists come in many religions, if not all, so don't associate the two. That's a whole different subject. Some of the greatest people I've ever met are Muslims.
It's also interesting to me that I've gone through so many different feelings and experiences, and God was there the whole time. The best way I can describe it is that the Spirit of God is sitting right next to me as I'm watching an interactive movie in front of me. That's exactly what it's like. When I'm feeling crappy, I don't have to worry because He's just right there. Plus he doesn't cut me off 5 seconds after I start speaking to Him.. something I've experienced too much and won't miss.
This whole trip is like a movie. It's slow at the beginning, intense in the middle, ends all of a sudden and then you think, now what? The movie's almost over. Once it's done, it's done. Then real life starts.
I don't think I've mentioned this story before but it comes to mind and I think it's interesting.
I was with some people when I was first getting acquainted with Jordan. It was late at night, probably around 2 and I was really tired, plus I was getting yelled at a lot for not understanding and I just wanted to go home. I said "God.. please. I don't know who else to tell. Please take me home." Literally 30 seconds later my friend got a call telling all of us to come home.
That's just the first time. I was SO THANKFUL. The second time, it was late again, and once again I was uncomfortable. I told someone this time so I could say I tried on my part. I said "Hey, I'm getting tired, I'll need to leave." Nothing. "No really, I'm falling asleep." Nothing. "God... PLEASE I sincerely want to go home. I'm not comfortable right now." This time it was like 20 seconds later and another phone call from the same person telling all of us to go home. A second time?? Ha.. that's cool :)
And that's just the second time. The third time, of course it was late again. I was not comfortable. We were all in the car and I told everyone, "I want to be home by 1." I don't even remember what time it was, but it was so close to 1 and the person driving just stopped outside a restaurant. I said, "Will we be home by 1?" and every time I asked they said, "It's ok we'll get back soon." What does that mean? People don't just park for a few minutes. So I prayed again and said, "God I know this is the third time, but I tried and it didn't do anything. Please.. sometime really soon I want to go home." It was seriously no more than 20 seconds later, ANOTHER phone call from the same person telling all of us to come home. That's funny actually. I had to laugh.
God is so generous! That was so nice, He didn't even have to listen to me. Not a coincidence. My prayers were all at different times, different days. There were other days it was late and I was uncomfortable and didn't pray about it. The calls were right after my prayers and on the days I prayed. How gracious is that? So much. Thanks so much.
Well it's 6:41 and I'm still not tired, so maybe I shouldn't sleep. If I sleep for 2 hours, I might not wake up. We'll see. I'll try to post a few more times before I leave.
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